When it comes to pets, the Adventuring Hero hit the jackpot. Waffles the Corgi was just about the friendliest puppy to ever prance around the Kingdom of Good. But, as their name implies, the Hero was, more often than not, adventuring far away from home. Naturally, Waffles was sad and worried for his human while he was gone, but showed them that much more love whenever they returned home.

One day, after a particularly long adventure, the Hero returned to Headquarters with a curious relic: The Femur of Acute Brilliance. To Waffles, the relic looked like a huge, delicious bone. Surely his human wouldn’t mind if he just took a few bites, right? Waffles leapt up and snatched the bone from the Hero’s hand. In an instant, the Femur of Acute Brilliance flooded Waffles with sapience and a genius-level intellect. Waffles immediately lamented his short stature and stubby legs. He hated that the Hero neglected him for days and weeks on end. He loathed the fact that he couldn’t contort his face to stop smiling. To top things off, the Hero berated and punished him for nibbling on the bone.

Waffles ran from his master and fashioned a new home for himself away from the Kingdom of Good. If he could no longer be blissfully ignorant about the world, he’d strive to make the world suffer along with him…




FETCH: During the End Phase of Waffle’s turn, if he did not Harvest a Resource, he may move one Lackey from his barracks to any open Basic Resource space within his Zone of Influence, then collect one token of the associated Basic Resource.